Runtu wrote:For me, all this stuff about wordplay and chiasmus, even if it were at all compelling, is that it pales in comparison to my knowing that I sold my conscience for the church. I rationalized pretty awful stuff because it was done by prophets and apostles. That I had also compromised my intellect was important, too.
This will sound terrible to some, but the people I know who started, as I did, defending the church but ended up on the other side, have one thing in common: integrity. All the BS excuses about why we leave (lack of testimony, desire to sin, etc., etc.) really come down to having the integrity to acknowledge that we were wrong. I don't know what it says about my integrity that it took me 10 years to go from acknowledging that LDS truth claims didn't work to recognizing the implications, but I'm glad I am where I am.
I think integrity is what it comes down to as well as some courage to face the consequences of breaking away from the group. You've shown both. I echo warerdog on your statement above.